The banner bearer has stumbled...

There is just like another round of things that I'm opening up in this entry...

You see, I'm kind of down again at the moment... Makes me feel like I'm in the wilderness, or something like that. Again. I'm sure I'm the only one who could have only caused this months ago; I have nobody to blame for this...

I'm not regretting this. Or at least, not yet at the moment... It's as if I cannot experience also being down. I feel guilty at the moment, and understandably a godly guilt also. But contrary to the pop psychologies preached by Oprah or whoever else, I'm not denying this guilt I have. I'll assume responsibility for the emotional rounds I'm having since months ago. Denying that means that I will not assume responsibility, because that precludes that I have nothing to assume for.

I'm raising my guilt up to God, knowing that He will deal with me as He sees whatever fits... And still I will trust in Him, whatever that will be... To whoever can understand what I'm going through at the moment, one thing I'm just asking is for your prayers. The banner bearer may have stumbled, but still my Banner is there.